Puke

That’s what I feel like right about this moment. I’m not sure I could run worse or play worse than I have in the past two weeks. I try to maintain composure when I miss every flop and find the second best hand every time but I am not immune to being beaten down.

I’m pretty sure this is the last time I have been beaten down, but then again I have said that time and time again. I think if I could just get a full time dreaded J.O.B, I could swallow the losses a little better, but right now, all I want to do is hurl at the thought at what has taken place over the past few weeks.

Poker is a fucking sick merry-go-round. You listen to the music and enjoy yourself while you are ahead, but next thing you know, you get thrown on your ass. You see everyone else still having a good time and smiling, so you get back on your horse. Then again, rinse, wash, and repeat.

Fuck I wish I had a dream story to go along with this pipe dream, but I’m all burnt out and full of excuses. The biggest regret of these past two years for me I think is not dedicated more cash to tournaments. I think my game would have served me well there as bets have to be respected that much more. But, one can’t go back in time and I’ll just have to live with the failure to play some donkaments.

Sick thought though that I could have played at least 7 of the smaller buy-in events at the WSOP with the roll that I have burnt up this year. Sick thoughts.